Christmas Blues

Over the Christmas period it can be hard to find the wood from the trees. We can get so overwhelmed with trying to capture the joy of Christmas, into one day forgetting the true meaning of Christmas. With all the stress that it brings, Christmas is about family; whether you believe in God or not and the story behind it. Christmas should be a time of love and care.

For some of us Christmas can be even harder, like the January blues, people can often find Christmas stressful for the same reasons.  Whether you have a form of anxiety or suffer from loneliness or a mental illness it can be hard. I know this from experience, I wanted to write this piece to encourage anyone who is suffering this Christmas to talk to someone about it. For me talking about my problems can be hard, because I felt that there was no one willing to listen. But you will find that there is amazing amount of people who would be willing to share and listen to you.

I have often been my own worst enemy, stopping myself from doing something or finding a way to express myself. Don't ever restrict yourself, for you are amazing!! This Christmas please find someone who you can share with, and if you have no one to share with I have enclosed a few links at the bottom.

Give your self the best Christmas present possible by not being afraid.


Sarah


List of Links:
The Samaritians
http://www.samaritans.org/

Childline
https://www.childline.org.uk/Pages/Home.aspx

Book 1: Along for the Ride by Sarah Dessen

Sarah Dessen is one of my absolute favourite authors. I have read this book so many times that I have lost count. So for the sake of the challenge I have decided to read one of my old favourites again. Prepare for spoilers within my review!

My review:
The story follows Auden, a girl whose world is turned upside down by the divorce of her parents. Her parents break up with no explanation, leaving a gap in her life. The book then starts a few years later just after she has finished her senior year, and deciding how to spent her summer. Being an over achiever Auden decides to spent her summer getting ready for college and studying. Both her parents are professors, so she studies to impress them. For years of being unable to sleep due to her parents fighting, Auden has been unable to sleep at night. Having enough of staying with her mum for the summer, she goes to stay with her father and his new young wife Heidi. Who have just had their first daughter together, Auden's half sister.

During this time away, Auden reconnects with her dad and meets Eli a withdrawn teenager with a lot of his own secrets. I found Auden and Eli's relationship inspiring, it starts small but leads to an easy friendship and then relationship. Something that Auden had not experienced well before. Not only does Auden meet Eli, but she breaks free of her mother's expectations and learns about herself.

Reading this book again, brought me back to the emotions of my teenage self, who was just trying to find herself. A lot like Auden in this book who is trying to find herself no matter what the consequences are. My favourite aspect of Dessen's work is her ability to give great character development, whilst being able to continue on with the main plot of the story. Coming away from reading her books always leaves you thinking about the deep meaning that Dessen puts into her books. Reading Along for the Ride was just the same, I learnt the values of meaning and friendship from Auden and the book keep me on my toes all the way through.

So for that reason I give the book 5/5 stars, Auden's story is a spine tinkling journey of life from a realistic perspective.

Wishing for tomorrow?

This is a more personal post,  I  will soon be putting up my first 5 books in the 100 book reading challenge. I have been bouncing between books trying to read as many as possible but only getting half way through. Finally, I have managed to finish some of them and I will be sharing them with you. This has also affected the way I feel in my personal life, I have had so many options that it has been hard to focus on what is true.

For awhile having too many options had left me feeling terribly overwhelmed, but in the last few days I have been given a new perspective. Perspective is a wonderful thing, it allows you to look back or look at a situation in a new way. Instead of being overwhelmed by the possibilities, I am now feeling free to start again. Finishing university, getting a better grade than expected on my degree, as well as watching my friends take on new but surprising opportunities is amazing. Just as equally, as it is scary, life is full of random but interesting moments that can make tomorrow a million miles away. Instead of wishing for tomorrow and wondering what will happen next; I am going to try and make it happen. Wishing for tomorrow, can be a fun and healthy thing that gives us a chance to dream. Dreaming allows us to imagine and can fuel us to do incredible things, but sometimes we can get stuck in it. By wishing for the things we don't have or wish to have we forget what we have now.

With the pressure of deciding what's next it is difficult to not do this, but I don't want to fill my life with options or possibilities but truth. Possibilities are not solid in their nature, they are incredibly fragile and by wishing for tomorrow in some ways I am doing this. This is not me trying to get you to stop dreaming but to be realistic about your options and take risks if you get to comfortable. Having too many options can hinder you and be the problem rather than the solution. I have recently discovered that waiting can be the hardest part of this. During this time, I have found that for me writing, has been a form of self expression, helping me to make sense of this and I hope that this blog can help express that feeling.

Sarah

What do we really need to make us happy?

I suppose in life in the 21st century it can seem to be so easy to know what we want. In a century where we have so much choice, technology, and freedoms. It can seem easy to be overwhelmed by the this choice, where do we go to university, how do we communicate with one another? Is it important too....

So many questions in a such a small space and time. In a way we can lose a sense of who we are and be overwhelmed by the amount of decisions we have to make in a daily basis. Some decisions are instinct, like to eat when we are hungry or to cry when we are in pain. Other decisions can take a lifetime to make. We can be so overwhelmed that we have no idea which way to go. This always for me seems to come to the question: What do we really need to make us happy?

I could answer this question in so many ways, and I know for some of us it is our families. Who take precedence over every one else. For others it is material things, or just simple events of everyday life. Happiness can be defined in so many ways that it means millions of different things to lots of different people. I asked in an earlier post What is happiness? At that time I was trying to seek answers for myself.

Normally I plan the posts I write however today at quarter to 12 at night I just decided to write this. For me this question has no answer, and I feel like this blog is turning into something bigger for me. A place to discuss the thing and issues that I don't always have the answers to. This question has been eating at me for a while, in three weeks I finally graduate and have to begin my new life. Its scary for me, but  it has made me think about this question. As I have had my head stuck in books writing essays, it has been burning in my mind.

For me time never seems to stand still and the only way I can see to answer this question is to think about the things I love. In some ways this makes it easier, I know I love my family, friends and the feeling of the breeze through my hair and watching a coral sunset (hence the name of the blog). Sometimes it can be so hard to answer. In 21st century Britain we are kept so busy it is hard to remember what is is important to us. Decisions can be the hardest and cruelest things in our lives but there is no need to be afraid. It is just important to remember the question: What do we really need to make us happy?

Please share what it is that makes you happy, I would love to know!!

Sarah x

What is loss?

With the recent crisis in the Middle East, it has got me thinking a lot about loss. I know that we all feel a sense of loss about different things. Whether it is someone disappearing from our lives through death or disappearance. Loss can impact us in so many different ways.

For me my own personal journey with loss is fairly normal. I personally have not lost any family extremly close to me. But I have lost people who I have cared for. Therefore I know how painful loss can be when a death impacts you when you least expect it. Losing someone you one day, was there and the next day you were gone. Whatever side you are on in your personal perspective or war someone will miss and experience loss by losing their loved ones. That's why family is so important, whether it is through your actual family, or adopted family even people who become like family. It helps and ties us as people through hard times.

Loss in its self is not always negative, it can help us change for the better. Whether a loved one is gone or we have lost something personal such as a dreaming falling apart. It will always get better. When you are in the deepest darkest of places, there will always be someone there for you. For me my faith in God helps me get through. For you it could be the next person you meet. Don't be afraid to share your hurt and grieve for who or whatever it is you have lost. It makes you stronger in the end.

I hope this encourages whoever reads this to know that you are not lost but you are found. Wherever you are....

Sarah